Say what??? 2017 is coming to an end?!

Where has the time gone? I have officially been unemployed for two years (would have lost track of it except that my renewal of license to practice sent a letter promptly to ask me for more $$$).

Do I miss clinical work? Of course. I miss the kiddos and the parents (not the crazy ones). I even dreamt about conducting sessions with the kids from time to time. I still keep in touch with some of my ex-clients and their parents. Some are coping well, some are not. Some mummies still messaged me occasionally when they needed help. Humbled that they still keep me in the loop and seek my advice from time to time. Come to think of it, it does mean something that they still trust me on my opinions when it comes to their kids. 

Do I regret putting my career on hold for the cheeky monkey of mine? To be honest, no. True that I earn alot lesser and I am still adapting to being dependent on my husband for financial support, I am just glad that I have the chance to witness every milestone that this baby of mine has and is still going through. No doubt it is very mundane and a 24/7 kind of job; no doubt that I will lose it sometimes and go into the crazy mother/wife mode; no doubt that I complained alot....I still think it is worth it to be able to go through this process without having to split myself between work and home. 

I love it when I get to wake up with my koala every morning. We often like to laze around in bed, partly because I refused to wake up. Although this boy is a very cheeky, rough and limit testing little person, I still love seeing him chuckle when we do rough play together. Now that he can speak simple words, I love it that he often calls for me - be it to irritate me with the non stop 'mama...mama...mama...' or to share/show me something that he found. I love it that he still hugs me as a bolster to sleep at night and always lifts up my shirt to touch my tummy/ belly button (yes that's how he falls asleep each night. He loves my fat tummy hahaha). Not too sure how we are going to get him to sleep on his own when the new house is here, we shall see how it goes. 

I guess the best feeling in the world is when I see how much koala loves playing/irritating his papa. It's like watching two kids playing together. Both are equally cheeky, noisy and crazy when they play with each other. It just warms my heart to see Puppy being silly when he's around koala. Perhaps now I should slowly let go and let them have father-son alone time, so that mummy can have 'me time' hahaha....o well...we shall see!

It's been a year!

O how time flies! It's been a year since I have last penned down my thoughts. It has been a steep-learning-curve; patience-testing; tear-rearing; know-your-spouse-better (the good and the bad) kind of year. 

Gave birth to Koala last year in April and now he is already a year old. Not a baby but not yet a toddler. Now he's all cheeky and ready to explore everything around him! He's picking things up so fast that sometimes I wish time can stand still for just that moment so that I can forever remember his actions, smiles and antics at that specific point of time. 

It was not easy taking care of an infant and sharing the load with the other half. There were quarrels (quarrels that we have never ever engaged in); there were anger (we have never been that angry with each other ever before); there were tonnes and tonnes of frustrations at times. But having stated those down side, there were also many laughter; many silly moments; many loving words and encouragement that both of us exchanged during the past year.  I can not imagine going through parenthood with anyone else but Pupz. It's the similar experience of climbing Mt K together. I do not think I can do that with anyone else other than him. We survived the climbing, we survived the first tedious year of taking care of Koala. Yeah!

Onwards, perhaps it's time to set more goals for myself to take care of my body and mind alittle more. I do not want to be the crazy mum and yellow face wife =(

Till the next update....

Yeah... I am finally done with the reports! No more reports! No more feeling guilty for not being able to send the reports! Yeah!! I can finally return all the files!

Anyway, have to step up on my exercises. After the Bangkok trip this weekends, I think I need to go for regular prenatal yoga classes to tone up and build the stamina...

On a side note, koala has been kicking so much more lately. His kicks are getting so much stronger and sometimes he seemed to be aiming at my bladder and that makes me wanna pee with each punch he did! Just yesterday, we could even see him pushing my tummy and making mini 'Kallang Waves'...so funny to see my tummy blobbing up and down...Hope he's doing well inside my tum tum...I can't wait to see him this Thursday when we go for the gynae...He's always hiding his face and back facing us when we did the ultrasound. Hopefully he'll let mummy and daddy see his face on Thursday!

Day 1- 4 of not working...

Alright...I have always been very slow in my responses and reactions towards situations. So this stay-at-home-till-delivery arrangement has not really sunk in much since the start of 2016. Partly also because Pupz took leave on the first 3 days to keep me company, which was very sweet of him.

Yesterday was technically the first day of me being home alone and not stepping out of the house. Cooked myself lunch, cooked dinner for the both of us. Not that bad except that lazy me did not go swimming nor exercise. My cooking skills sucks. I think I can survive on the food that I cooked for myself but to accommodate for Pupz's taste bud, I think it's still a long way to go. Porridge was cooked too early and hence turned out like baby porridge..nua nua one...tomato egg, turned out funny, xiao bai cai turned out alittle hard, though my explanation was it'll be too soft if I cooked it any longer. O well...at least we had a good laugh at it and he still finished his food..hahahahhaa....

As for today, went out to meet an ex-colleague for lunch. Then went home. Started to do abit of chores - vacuuming and mopping the floor, washing and drying the clothes...Felt so much like an aunty...but what to do, since I have the time on hand, might as well slowly pack and clean the house. I dread packing my room...There's so many things to pack away and prepare for Alexander's arrival! Plus I am not the most organized person to begin with. I need to start getting things ready for the little koala...so many things to follow up...and this Sat we have the pre-natal course to attend. Hopefully we'll have fun and not get too traumatized with the visual stuffs on deliver =p

 Gonna go swimming now!

Happy 2016!!!

Have not been writing since August as I was either too busy, too lazy or too tired to do so.

It's bittersweet, crossing from 2015 to 2016.

Bitter because I bid farewell to the kiddos that I have been seeing and my lovely colleagues, making the decision to quit  after 7-8 years of working in the same company. I finally managed to put the guilt aside (as in the responsibility towards my kiddos) and make plan for my family and I. I think I have reached a point where I am done with how the company's management has evolved and I know I can leave the company as I do not want to take any more crap. As much as I used to think I could grow with the company, I realize it is such a naive thought on my part. It is a great environment to be in, with lovely colleagues who are opened minded and supportive. But with employers who are not appreciative of the employees' effort and constantly passing false judgement, it is just disheartening to stay on.  I have finally come to conclusion that it is better that I leave than to stay on, making myself unhappy with things that are not within my control.

Sweet because I have a baby nephew, Andrew, he is sooooo adorable and chubby! His smiles can absolutely melt your heart. Another sweet thing is that I am expecting! Gonna be due in late March/ early April. I cannot wait to see little koala. Now that I can feel him moving and squirming inside me, it is really an amazing feeling! I am glad that hubby is supportive of me taking a break from work. I know it is quite stressful on his part especially financially, I am really grateful to have his support in my decision to quit working for awhile.

Anyhow, I will try to blog more especially on my pregnancy and my random thoughts.

1) Have not been feeling well :( It's either I'm feeling giddy or nausea...worse is when I caught the freaking coughing bug and I have been coughing my lungs out plus having a sore throat...Very irritable lately and I'm glad that puppy has been very understanding and patient with me...

2) I didn't go back to punggol today as I do not want to pass the bug to my dad. The last thing he should get is to fall sick, let alone having coughin which he always takes super long to recover plus I think it will probably hurt his wound. Felt so guilty that mama had prepared chicken wings for us but we were not able to make it home as I was feeling terrible the whole day. We pretty much just stay indoor, watch tv, sleep and rest...

3) Mother-in-law cooked bird nest for us all! Though puppy didn't take it as he didn't like it...his portion is in my tummy now...ha ha ha...very touched to have my mother-in-law doting on us and cooking for us. I'm so lucky to have her as my mummy.

I hope I have enough energy to go work tomorrow!!!

1) Not feeling well today and had to take MC for the day.

2) Glad that I get to rest. Didn't sleep much though. Just not feeling well all over esp in the day...

3) Glad that I feel better towards the end of the day...hope tomorrow I'll feel better!

1) Got to go back and keep papa company after he's been discharged. His wound is still in the midst of healing, there was less discomfort but I think he's still doesn't quite have the appetite to eat yet. Hope he gets better soon.

2) Was playing around with B and C. It was hilarious as usual. C made me a 'I love gu gu' card...while B was busy lying in puppy's tummy, listening to his tummy making sounds. Dun ask me why he did that, it was so funny, I guessed he just find it fun to do.

3) Puppy started playing the 'ask Siri question' game and it got B and C so interested. Some of the questions they asked were so silly yet funny!

1) Had to go relative's house to do some bai bai as it was puppy's grandma's death anniversary. It's like a mini family gathering and everyone made time to come by and gather. Lunch was filled with endless amount of food - curry chicken, bee hoon etc...so happy to see the folks laughing and eating at the same time.

2) Manage to catch some rest time. Lately it's been like a no-nap-cannot-function mode...

3) Played mj and I lost like big time!!! Urgh...money aside, it's still fun though as we always talked and joked around.

1) I was so freaking low in energy! Had to push myself to last between 1-6pm. Body function seems to deteriorate as I age...

2) Met up with puppy and his friends for dinner. Was so zombified that I was in a daze moving from office to vivo city. Really couldn't quite open my eyes.

3) Caught the movie 'Attack on Titan'. I thought I would fall asleep but I didn't. It was really nice! Always loved Japanese movie! So glad that puppy said he wanna watch it, if not I would have given it a miss.

1) Too tired today. Slept early last night but still feeling lethargic. Good that I didn't have that many kids to see today.

2) Puppy was not feeling well so I ended up cooking dinner for both of us - porridge, egg, xiao bai cai with mushrooms.

3) Got in contact with an ex student's mum. Hilarious conversations. Hope to see the girl soon to see how she's been!

1) Managed to go through the day albeit feeling tired. It's been getting tough to go work esp after the long break

2) Glad that kids were good and as funny as always. Always a bless to see them improve.

3) Happy to have dinner with puppy at home. He's not bee feeling too well, so guess we'll sleep early tonight

1) Super dun feel like going to work... O man...like Andy said...inertia was huge in bringing myself back to work....glad things went well though

2) Doc said papa can be discharged tomorrow. Bro will be down handling it, so that's good.

3) Met up with puppy after visitation. He knocked of late so we bought late dinner home. Glad to be able to have dinner with him :)

1) Discover a new order system at yishun macdonald. Pretty cool I must say...and it was so much faster!

2) Think papa can be discharged soon...yeah...finally he can go home and rest.

3) Finally met up with Peifen!!!! Omg has it been a year already??? I missed her so much!!! So glad that she's back here!!! No more time lag msges! So much to talk and update her. Just so happy to have her back! No matter what it is, you've been a very brave and strong woman...move forward and look ahead k!

1) We started the day with breakfast at Tiong Bahru. It was awesome and I think we ordered too much food! Was so stuffed with the food that the boys ordered...

2) Went to visit papa again. He seemed a lot better. Slightly lesser pain and was more mobile than yesterday. Good progress I supposed.

3) Spent the rest of the day at home playing mj with Andy and Abby. Dinner was packed home and we ate while watching the National Day Parade. Have always been proud to be a Singaporean. It's a pity Lee Kuan Yew wasn't here to witness the celebration. Without him, Singapore would not have become this successful. We are only humans, we all have our worries and burden to carry. I really wonder how did someone like him be so driven and strong willed in pushing such a small nation forward? Thank you for all that you've done. Without you, none of us can enjoy the lifetyle that we have now. Happy 50th National Day!

1) Went to see the gynae today. Glad everything is alright :)

2) Went to see dad in the afternoon, his epidural was off and he's in alittle more pain due to the churning and discomfort. Glad to see him sitting up and walking around abit.

3) Had steamboat dinner at Uncle Peter's house. So fun and yummy! The boys were talking about stuffs and it was hilarious! Great way to spend the eve of national day :)

1) Yeah today dun need to work! So glad we get to rest today. Had curry rice for lunch with my in laws and then off we went to visit papa. My in laws, Andy and Abby came along too. Glad papa is resting better and able to talk better.

2) Went to watch Mission Impossible with the Neos. Movie was not too bad...pretty entertaining..

3) Played Mahjong with the gang...I end up losing the most...nonetheless it was fun!

1) Papa's surgery went well, albeit not able to do keyhole procedure, I'm glad he pulled through such big surgery. He looked pretty good post - op too...not too pale...could joke some more...

2) Glad that mum has been coping fairly well with papa's op. She seemed to take it quite alright and not too anxious.

3) Grateful that puppy drove me to hospital and drove mama and me home. I know he's tired from work and the traveling journey was really far...

1) Went to visit a friend who got hospitalized. Glad that she was well after the operation. She looked really good. And the fact that she's craving for food pre and post operation, I guess that's a good sign!

2) Visited papa in KTPH. The folks kept bickering, I ended up having to drag mama away and said bye to papa before he started getting more mad. Felt like I was dealing with two kiddos, so exhausting. And this only happened after bro left -_- Anyhow, hope the operation will go well tomorrow...

3) Made my way down to join puppy and his colleagues. Glad that I get the chance to meet them as I've heard puppy mentioned about them so often.

*On the side note, I'm getting more tired and frustrated with things around me. It's frustrating when my body is going haywire.

1) Caught LKY musical with Nikki...it's not too bad actually. Kinda like attending history lesson but in the musical form. Adrian Pang was really good! Both singing and acting...he's really good in plays...I missed the time when I caught him on 'Boeing Boeing' it was such a good play with the late Emma Young too...

2) Puppy came to fetch me after the play despite him being tired.

3) Was so hungry after watching the musical as I only had a small snacks before the show. Had some nuggets for supper and felt soooo satisfied after!