latest update...

gotten back my life and freedom today...took me this long to get to this stage isnt it...chance was given but misused despite me deliberately asking him about it...since he has the cheek not to admit it...then no point going on from there...

i hope he goes busted one day...judging from the way it goes...he's not ready for anything...except being a child trapped in an adult suit...

anyway...gina gave birth to her baby boy today! so proud of her! went thru 12 hours of labour...she looked so exhausted when i went to visit her...hehe managed to carry her baby for a short while! so so cute! reminds me of the time when auggy was born....

gonna go sleep...i'm tired...

belly piercing here i come!

feeling blue...why?

am i being appreciated both at work and in relationship...somehow i always get this feeling that both can do with or without my presence...

anything can be replaced...ultimately one juz has to learn...to live and be alone somehow...

flipped thru the diary i've written years ago...the poem i wrote still stand...it was dark but so true...wrote it in chinese though...back then my chinese was so much better...ha

suddenly i miss someone...miss hanging out with her...i think it's been a year or so since we last meet up...how come things turn out this way? why is it that she finds it unbearable to talk to me...

last monday...we nearly rammed into the bus while on the way to collect my screen...half the time during the ride i was trying to anchor myself so that i wont fly off the bike...i'm not that light am i...hmm....

we were close...so close...rammed my head into bro's helmet when he e-brake...thankfully the bike didnt skid or fell side way...the engine juz went dead after that...

i can't help but think wat would have happened if bro didnt e-brake fast enough...i can't bear the thought of him being injured...he juz started his fatherhood...so much more awaiting him to explore and experience with auggy...

if i were injured...i think i'll suffer from multiple fractures...looking at how small my bone structure...and with that maybe i'll die on the spot...cos all the factures may be juz poking into my organs and making me bleed to death...at least be dead on the spot will be good...i dun wanna be a burden to anyone...

i havent quite been able to fall sleep lately..

i'm a happy girl now...cos i've juz gotten my lcd screen from adrian! muah haha...no more fuzzy screen!!! thanx adrian!

now i''m stuck to my com...trying to type my reports...haha...although it's work...i dun mind at all cos i no longer need to strain my eyes!!!

i havent been saving up much since i start working...this is bad...i've got to start a new acc with no card and start saving up with my next salary...if not i'm never gonna be able to afford a lappy which i need when i go oversea...

gtg liao...will blog more tomolo!

was feeling sooo tired today...perhaps the 2 days course broke my momentum for work...juz feeling plain drained and lousy mood today...esp after the meeting...sigh...

wonder if my tiredness is due to my low blood pressure or that i'm juz not getting enough rest...

went for health screening the previous week....and my BP was 90/53! Never knew that my BP was that low...o well...my weight is still the same...43 kg...will have to wait for the blood test results to be out...hopefully nothing is wrong with my body system...

been having weird dreams lately...disrrupt my sleep...makes me feel even more tired despite me sleeping alot....i miss last friday nite so so much...cos i get to watch movie and sleep in till 1.30pm the next day...feels so good to laze around with no burden from work...

did i mention...i zonked out on sat nite...with ray, jessie and peifen....i puked so much that i was still puking the very next day...that was how bad my hangover was...damn...no more death drop or drop dead...i think i've come to the stage where my body juz cant take so much alcohol like i used to 2 years back....the fact that i need one whole day to recover tells me that i can only take 2-3 beers next time...shots will juz kill me man....

as sian as i felt at the end of the day...as low as i felt when i knocked off....i'm pretty glad that i get to meet up with ck and james to catch the cosmetic-surgeon-directed-typical-singaporean-with-no-climax-hokkien-local film...

and also to hear from someone trying to cheer me up and making sure that i'm feeling alright...

gtg...i need to sleep....

so sorry for not updating my blog religiously...been feeling lazy to update esp after work and with my fuzzy screen...i have no choice but to shut down my computer before i blind myself...

soon...i'm getting my lcd screen fixed...getting a sceond hand screen...cos it's cheaper and i wont be around next year so no point getting a new one...letting it get dusty and spoilt all over again...

adrian, if u're reading my blog...thanx for helping me ask ur fren...i know i keep changing my mind...thanx for being patient with me...

updates in my life...

1 september...i've become former AH staff...but HR havent drafted out the new contract yet...in the process of creating it i think...

and by oct 18 i'll have to go JMC....after all the changes...i'm still going to boon lay to work afterall...excited and scared at the same time...cos i'll be all alone...o man...

i finally went back schl for squash...it felt so good to be back...and my skills dropped like nobody's business...sigh...o recently there's safra novice open competition...my mates participated and i've been down to support them...so happy to see them play and compete...think i need to brush up my skills before entering any competition...=p

i've juz helped nikki changed her flight...wah biang...the operator's aussie accent so strong...think i'll die there leh...how how how....