one more day to attachment...one more day....

what have i been doing? settling squash stuff as best as i can...trying to read up 'hands' stuff...which reminds me...everytime it comes to 'hands'...i'm always hugging buddha's leg...except that this time round nikki is not with me...i'm alone...

managed to spend time with hairul today...nice...felt more settled and very much contented being with him the whole day...i know i can be difficult at times...i appreciate him for tolerating my tantrums, mood swings and my fickle-mindedness...i always try to think of a win-win situation for the both of us which can turn out pretty upsetting and bizarre sometimes...sorry for making things difficult...

the talk over the phone last nite...i truly appreciate that too...it puts me at ease knowing that we both are trying to make the best out of this relationship...nothing is easy...we both are aware of that...but at least we are happy with wat we have now...
thank u baby...

i guess i have to start singing my helium voice song...i will survive...need to pull thru this week...
reality...i need to face it...